The First, The Last, My Everything
by ValeurStories
Summary: "I really didn't do it! I just arrived to town. I'm looking for a person, Hikaru Hitachiin, I'm his brother." but the cobs ignored him. The twins were separated at birth, but Kaoru have decided to find his brother, who appears to be the towns rebel. YAOI
1. Prologue

**Hi guys, **

**New story, new plot - same pairing. :D **

**Please read and tell me your thoughts. ^^**

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><p><strong>Prologue <strong>

**(_Hika POV_)**

I live in a truly beautiful town. A place where the air always smells of purity and salt from the sea. You will often find old – as well as young – people fishing by the coasts, and you would surely think, 'they most really enjoy life here'.

Any person who came from the outside and saw this would think that; all people here had to be friendly and kindhearted, because that's how it would appear. Why shouldn't people in this, paradise of a town, be kind, welcoming? And money or family definitely _mustn't_ be a problem here, right?

But that assumption is wrong. They mattered. They mattered so much that I couldn't take it anymore. I had to break free. So I became the towns rebel. Because I was different than all of them.

Because no one understood me, until he came. And he came in a very strange situation:

oOo oOo oOo

"Hitachiin! Let me get off!" Tamaki yelled at me, making a panicking wave of his hand. I ignored him and kept looking straight ahead, eyes pinned on the road. Tamaki screamed that I should stop the car, but I ignored him – as well as the sound of a screaming police car behind me– determined, pressing my right foot down further on the speeder.

"You're fucking crazy!" he screamed at me, but luckily didn't dare to touch me when I drove so fast. Red lights and honking cars flung past me, and if anyone else had driven the car, they would have been a red spot on the road.

But I knew what I was doing.

I turned up sharply by a deserted road, making Tamaki dig his fingers into the seat in fear. "Please let me get off," he whined. I fought the urge to roll my eyes. It was Tamaki who had asked to trail along in the first place. Now he was sitting beside me and clenching around his seatbelt like a lifeline.

"Are they still behind us?" I asked him calmly, quickly swinging past a slow pacing car, which angrily honked at me - what, had they never seen a guy pass them by swinging inside a yard and around?

"Hikaru, this is-"

"I said! Are they still behind us?" I snapped. Tamaki made a frustrated groan, but then turned in his seat and looked back.

"Almost, they are far behind though," he whispered.

"Good," I smirked and turned the car into a small driveway. Parking it quickly.

"W-why are you stopping?" he stuttered, looking at me with wide eyes.

"I thought you _wanted _to stop," I teased, before jumping out of the car. Tamaki follows me panicking, looking around like a hunted rabbit.

"Well, I would rather keep driving than end up in jail," the blonde said, trailing me like a little kid. I sighed and closed my jacket when the cold hit me.

"Act casually," I mumbled, when I heard the police car coming closer. I reached into my pocket and fished a cap up, reaching it to my bleach-blonde friend. "Put this on, your hair is too noticeable."

"I-" he began, but when he heard the police sirens too he just did as he was told. I closed my black jacket and put a black hat on as well, before putting a cigarette between my parted lips and looked down to light it up with my tuned lighter. I offered Tamaki one, but he just hissed and waved it away.

The cars drove right past us, loud and blinking, but very ignorant. I smirked a little before I realized they were pulling in just a few blocks ahead. The cigaret dropped from my lips.

"Shit," I hissed.

"What are we going to do?" Tamaki squeaked, frightened. "I can't go _to jail_, I have to take over the Suoh Company, what am I going to do? What am I-"

"Hush! Just-" I began, but suddenly blinked in surprise. They weren't coming toward _us_. They were approaching some kid who was just sitting on a bench under the streetlights and waiting for a bus.

"Freeze!" they yelled at him.

"Can I help you with-" he began, but the cobs moved in without a word.

I stretched my hand out and stopped Tamaki from moving. "Hide!" I commanded, shoving him inside the shadows before he had time to protest. What the hell was happening?

"What the- what are you doing?" the unfamiliar boy exclaimed shocked when he was forced around and the police started to search his pockets for weapons.

The cobs had grabbed the kid around the arm, and forced his hands on his back. They spoke to him in calm controlled voices and it took me all my concentration to hear what they were saying. When they were done talking, the boy looked and sounded totally outraged.

"I haven't done anything," I heard him complain and struggle, but the cobs ignored his protests and got the cuffs closed. "I'm not this "rebel"-person, I never stole any car or money! My name is Kaoru! I have just came here to find my brother."

"I think that guy just took our burden," I laughed. I almost couldn't believe our luck.

"Oh, that guy is screwed," Tamaki mumbled, he looked over my shoulder and made a relieved sigh. I made a wicked smile toward him and he smiled back. This guy had without even knowing, saved our asses.

I slammed my fist with Tamaki's in joy. We were about to bail from the scene, when the boy suddenly said something that shocked me so much that I stopped in a movement.

"I really didn't do it! I just arrived to town. I'm looking for a person, Hikaru Hitachiin, I'm his _brother_."

I stared shocked at Tamaki. "Did he just say-" Tamaki shook his head confused. My head flung around and I looked at the person – really looked."Well shit." I whispered and widened my eyes.

"Hikaru, let's get out of here," Tamaki begged, but I was as frozen.

This person was freaking looking exactly like ... me. I mean his clothes were neatly ironed, his hair looked glossier from fancy shampoo and he was wearing a freaking TIE! But his face was mine- I mean, it was his, but it was _mine._

"Hikaru!" Tamaki yelled and slapped me across the shoulder. I blinked and ran a hand through my hair in shock.

"Um, yeah. Yes, let's get out of here," I rambled, hitting him on the shoulder before hurrying away.

What the hell was happening?

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><p><strong>If you want a chapter two just clickity-click that review button and tell me your thoughts. ^^<strong>


	2. Chapter 1

**Chapter 1.**

**Everyone keeps telling me how surprised they are with what I've done. **

**But I'm telling you honestly that it doesn't surprise me. ****I knew I could do it.**

- **Ralph Waldo Emerson**

_(Hikaru POV)_

"I need the money you owe me," I said, pulling the scared kid from my math class toward me by the collar when he passed me in the hallway. I didn't even remember his name.

He made wide eyes when he felt my hand pulling him aside, and even wider when he saw who it was. But he quickly gathered himself and coughed uncomfortably by my rough hold.

"Hikaru? I- I don't have them-"

"I _don't _think you heard me," I whispered, letting go of his collar, watching him stumble. "I need that money tonight. One of my… friends… is in trouble and I need to get him out of it."

This was so pointless. I had just seen this guy, Kaoru, who happened to look exactly like me at a bus stop. And he had claimed to be _someone's_ brother, who _might_ be me. I wasn't even sure I had a brother, and now I was going crazy trying to get him out of jail. I didn't even recognize myself at this point.

"What kind of trouble?" the kid asked me timidly, snapping me out of my thoughts and back into character.

"That's none of your business," I cut out, leaning myself toward him. "But you know what is your business? Getting my money. Because if you don't have them for me, you might find an unpleasant surprise in your locker tomorrow morning."

I had no idea what to put in his locker, but my threat had worked.

"F-fine," he stuttered. "I'll get it tomo-"

"No! You'll get it _today_, before lunch ends, in the gym. Understood?" I snapped my fingers, making him look horrified.

"How am I supposed to get so much money in that little time?"

"You should have thought about that before you _burrowed_ so much money," I sighed. He opened his mouth to argue, but I was done talking – so I turned and walked away. Not looking back.

While I walked I started thinking. About the person, named Kaoru. Was it possible that he was my broth-

"Oh, I'm sorry," I light voice exclaimed when a girl accidentally walked into my shoulder in her hurry to class. She had straight brown hair and big squared glasses, making her eyes seem larger behind the lenses. I stared at her coldly and she winced under my glare.

"Watch your big feet!" I hissed at her.

"I-I-"she whispered.

"I-I," I imitated her mockingly. "What are you trying to say?"

"I'm sorry, I didn't see you," she mumbled, looking at the floor with a shameful expression. Fake. She was like so many others in this town, at this school. Looking so innocent and pure on the outside, but I knew her. She was the girl that always went to church, did charity work and studied until late at night to get good grades. Everyone would see her as a pearl of society.

But I knew. I knew that she judges everyone who wasn't as _perfect_ as she was. Because they all did. I had seen her talk with her friends. Laughing at the large kid in gym. Wrinkling her little nose, at the gay guy in history class. Laughing at the rebels, like me, because we only craved for attention. All this just made me want to vomit.

"Maybe you should use those glasses," I hissed at her. "Maybe you should try to see things around you."

"I will," she whispered, wrapping her hands together as a nervous child.

"And while you're at it-"

"Ahaha! Just kidding!" a cheerful voice broke in, sweeping an arm around my shoulder forcefully. Tamaki. "Sorry, sorry! He's just having a bad day. Get to class safely." I shoot him an icy glare.

The girl swallowed shyly, but then hurried down the halls. I made an annoyed groan and threw Tamaki's arm off of me. I lifted a finger toward him and pronounced my words slowly.

"Don't. Ever. Touch-"

"Oh, Hikaru," Tamaki sighed, smiling that goofy smile, and trailing after me down the hall like he always did. "Don't be like that."

I rolled my eyes. Tamaki was technically my friend, but he was also one of the people at this school who annoyed me the most. Strange combination, I know.

"You're so annoying- oh yeah! By the way, I need the money you owe me, and a little extra as well," I mumbled, trying to calculate the money on my fingers. Tamaki was stunned by my sudden change of attitude, but then he just smiled merrily.

"Sure, how much do you need?"

"I need about-" I began, when time suddenly stopped. My mouth stayed open, never finishing the sentence it had started, when my mind got pulled elsewhere. Tamaki furrowed his eyebrows and followed my eyes before chuckling.

"You can't seriously still be in that dilemma," he grinned, looking at the thing that had caught my eyes.

"Shut up," I murmured and blinked twice to get back to reality. It was hard to force my eyes off the perfection I saw, but I manage somehow.

"You should really-"

"I don't need your advice," I stopped him, lifting my finger.

"But I could-"

"No!"

"If you just-"

"No!"

"Hikaru, if you just-"  
>"SHUP UP! Just leant me some fucking money!"<p>

**oOo oOo oOo**

_ (Kaoru POV)_

"Let me out!" I whined, pressing my exhausted head toward the cold metal bars. The cobs were still ignoring me, reading their stupid newspaper.

I had never imagined myself behind _bars_. The police had come out of nowhere and yanked me into their car – saying I had done all sorts of crazy things. Saying that I was a criminal. And now they had brought me to the station until I could be FREAKING transferred to a FREAKING jail. God!

When I had left my town, to find my long lost brother I had never imagined that I would be accused for stealing a car or robbing a supermarket. Absurd, right?

The policemen had accused me falsely! I couldn't believe this. Why was this happening to me?

"Hey!" a loud voice called on me, slamming on the bars very close to my face, and my head snapped up from my depressing moment. My golden orbs expanded in surprise when I saw the guard that was keeping watch over me sticking a key in the door with a phone in his hand.

"What? Can I go?" I exclaimed, jumping to my feet.

"Yeah, someone paid for your release," the guard said unhappily, pointing at the phone.

"Wha- who?"

"I don't know, some punk," the guard mumbled unhappily and opened the door for me. I don't think I have walked faster out of a door in my life. I didn't know whom my savior was, but I was eternally thankful that I had gotten out of that stinking cell.

"Hey!" the guard spat, grabbing my shoulder on my way out. I looked frightened up into his icy glare, wincing a little. "Don't think you're off the hook, kid."

"Y-yes sir," I whispered, waiting for him to let go. He eyed me for another moment before he released me.

After that cheerful farewell I almost collapsed on a bench outside the police station. My head dropped into my palms and I let out an exhausted sigh. Wondering. What had just happened?

It had become slightly dark outside already, so I should probably find a hotel soon. I staggered to my feet, but shivered slightly. My head swung around and I scanned my surroundings with furrowed eyebrows. Do you know the feeling of being watched?

I turned my head, but no one was there. I sighed, maybe I was getting paranoid.

**oOo oOo oOo **

_(Hikaru POV)_

I was such a creeper. What was wrong with me?

Why didn't I just go home? Stupid. Instead of coolly walking away from the scene, I was now standing by the corner of the street, wearing a black hoodie to shadow my eyes, while spying on that Kaoru-person for reasons I don't know.

I peeked forward, but then realized he was turning his head and quickly yanked my own head back. I immediately blushed at my lameness. I don't know if "lameness" is an official word, but it fit me perfectly at the moment.

But I was just so curious. This person, who looked so much like me, had appeared out of nowhere. Wasn't it normal for a human-being to be curious?

I leaned forward to look past the wall again. He was moving.

I pulled my hoodie a little further down my face before _casually _walking after him. I ignored the little voice in my head chanting, "Stalker! Stalker! You're such a stalker!" and swallowed a little.

I looked up and finally something clicked in my head that I hadn't even realized. This _ignorant_ idiot had pulled his phone out, and was now concentrating on a text, while walking straight toward a lamppost.

My lips pressed together in stress.

He was going to walk into it in 5 steps. That was for sure. Should I stop him? Should I call out? Or would that break my cover and force me to face his stunned expression when he saw that I was probably the brother he was looking for.

4 steps.

Could I deal with him being my brother?

3 steps.

My eyes flickered across the scene, trying to figure out what to do.

2 steps.

Oh fuck… he was going to crash. I took longer strides toward him.

1 step.

With a pained groan I reached out and grabbed his shoulder. "Watch out!" I spat, taking him by surprise. His eyes widened when his nose was only an inch from the pole.

"O-oh!" he stuttered, hurrying to jump to the side before his face would connect with the pole. He swung his head around and I bent my own face down to cover my features with a panicking – and rather awkward – movement.

"Wow, thanks, that was a close one," he laughed shocked. I looked up from the darkness of my hoodie and almost hissed in a breath. He really looked exactly like me, from the shape of our noses, to the length of our eyelashes. Identical.

He was running a hand through his messy auburn hair, which now looked more like mine when it wasn't styled so neatly. I shook my head a little. This just couldn't be happening. I had to get out of here.

I spun around, my back facing him.

"No problem," I stuttered and started to walk away. This had been enough stalking for today.

"Hey, one second," he called out, and I stopped in a step. I nervously played with the edge of my hoodie, turning very slowly. Had he seen my face? Was he going to freak out physically as I was mentally?

"Yes?" I questioned, stunned by how calm I sounded.

"Could you tell me where I can find a hotel?" he asked me, taking me by surprise. I felt a weight drop from my shoulders and I smiled a little in relief. He hadn't seen me.

"Yeah, sure. There's one just by-"

That's when a rough wind suddenly came out of nowhere and blew my hoodie off.

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><p><strong>I thought that was a pretty fast update, if I may say so myself. : D<strong>

**Thank you for all the awesome reviews. I know this cliffy is a lot like one of my other stories, but whatever. It's definitely not going to be like it. ^_^**

**Awesome ppl: **

**MusicMixerGURL (**Yeah, Hika need Kaoru to be crazy with. lol. ^_^)

**KuroPika X (**Aw, you're too sweet. :D I'm happy you like my fics. ^_^ I always put Kaoru in the main focus in my stories, so I wanted to try doing it with hika - that's why he's the rebel. hehe. Let's see how it'll turn out. :b)

**kyleisdabest** (hehe, I'll be sure to grant your wish. :)**)**

**Hikaru-and-Kaoru-Love** (Thank u! :D I love YOU! ^_^ And I WILL update)

**wishIwereanime** (Thanks, I was worried the beginning was a little too boring... so thank you for saying that. :))

**Victoria62015 **(*blush* that's so sweet of you to say. You make me smile, hehe. =^_^=)

**lotlot** (I know right. Hikaru will be a lot more jerkish in the future chapters though. hehe. :b)

**I'll Nom Your Soul **(Yay, thanks. :D Hope you'll keep reading)

**brings074065** (And I love you! Because you're so sweet and you make my favorite smiley, but my keyboard is broken, so I can't make the star thingy at the moment, and now this message is just getting random. hehe. :b)

**aliisa-chan** (Hehe, Thanx! :D I'll do so. And I like him as a rebel too... that's why I created him. Mwuhaha. xD)

**GoPlayInTrafficxox** (Um... that story is done. Finito. xD I know it was a cliffy ending, but that's my style, ya know. :D I'm too lazy for sequels, unless it really tickle in my fingers to make one. :D Thank you for reading. ^_^)


	3. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2**

**There are two to kiss and to two to hug, **

**and best of all there are two to Love, with all my heart!**

**~Unknown**

(_Hikaru POV)_

That's when a rough wind suddenly came out of nowhere and blew my hoodie off.

I hissed in a breath in surprise, and Kaoru's eyes expanded to double the size.

That was it!

I was prepared for everything. I had been laying awake all night and thought about all the possible reactions my (possibly) brother would make when he saw me for the first time: Surprise, fright, horror, disappointment, joy, happiness, maybe even confusion or shock.

But I never imagined him tripping backwards and hitting his head into the pole I had just saved him from seconds ago. Thereafter he passes out on the street without as much as a sentence spoken-

Wait what? say again?

"H-hey!" I stuttered shocked, crouching to the ground next to his unconscious body. I opened and closed my hands in panic, not sure if I should touch him or not. "Hey! K-Kaoru, right? Wake up!" I hesitantly poked him on the forehead, watching his head swing back and forth limbless.

I cursed a little under my breath, looking around frantically, but the streets were dark and deserted. Not a single person to help me out of this. Should I just leave him there? It wasn't _that_ cold; he could surely survive the night. I bit my lip, before letting out another swearword.

"You're growing soft, you freaking idiot," I whispered to myself, before slowly swinging Kaoru's arm around my shoulder and lifting him up. He was heavier than I thought and I tripped around for a bit, gathering balance, before I started walking down the street.

I didn't take one step without cursing myself, this Kaoru-guy and the higher powers – who clearly hated me.

And that statement was soon concurred when the first drop of rain hit my nose.

"Wha-" I began, looking up at the dark clouds above, soon feeling another drop of _damned _liquid hit my forehead. My teeth gritted. "You got to be joking, right? Can't a guy catch a break here!" I complained loudly, almost losing hold around Kaoru as I kicked a stone in anger.

I started walking faster, almost half-dragging Kaoru's feet along the sidewalk. My breath caught in my throat in exhaustion after only a while. I really had to smoke less than two packs a day.

Soon it was pouring down with cascades of rain. Not the light misty kind, or the harsh windy kind, but the huge wet drops that soak you to the bone in an instant.

I wandered the streets quickly, knowing it like the back of my hand even blinded in the close cascades of rain and I soon found shelter under an old bridge. I shivered uncomfortably once out of the storm, I was so soaked that my clothes slicked to my body as an extra layer of skin, and my hair dripped raindrops down my cheeks and hung in my eyelashes.

I used my last energy to curse the last swearwords out of my mouth, before placing my unconscious mirror-imaged at the side of the bridge and dropping wearily down by his side. I bent my head backwards to rest on the cold bricks, feeling the cold mist float from my lips and closed my eyes for a moment.

"Wh-where-" I heard Kaoru stutter and opened my eyes slowly. Of course he would wake when I already _had_ carried him across town.

"You're really heavy, did you know?" I mumbled half-heartily. His eyes fluttered wide open, staring at me like a huge question mark. He opened his mouth to speak, his golden orbs flickering over me repeatedly.

"Y-you-" he chopped through the words,+ and I nodded with an amused expression. He flung a hand through his wet hair, staring at me like I was an alien.

"I know. I look exactly like you. I find it pretty creepy too," I mumbled.

"I- I found you!" he exclaimed, taking me by surprise, but then I coughed into my fist to gather myself. "You're my brother! Hikaru, right?"

"Um," I murmured dumbstruck. "I, well, guess."

"I'm so happy to see you!" he whispered, still in shock. "I have been looking everywhere. Believe me, but then I got a hint from one of my friends that he saw _me_ in this town, and I wasn't near it. So I thought that it could only be you, and now I found you. You're actually here!"

I just stared at him while his mouth runned wild.

oOo oOo oOo

(_Kaoru POV)_

It was really Hikaru! My brother – twin even, it seemed. He was staring at me, looking both stunned and confused, but not repulsed. That was a good thing. I guess I had already failed the first impression, but I could still make up for that.

"So, I thought you would come with me home," I told him, restraining myself from pulling him into a hug in my excitement. I had always wanted a brother, someone that I could tell things that no one else would understand, to share my dreams. My house was so lonely when it was just me. My friends were great, but I would absolutely adore a relative and here he was. Soaked and confused, but he was there.

"Home? With you?" Hikaru asked, looking at me like I had just asked him a very hard math question.

"Well, yeah, we're family," I smiled.

"Um," he murmured, reaching into his pocket and retrieved a pack of cigarettes. "I mean, don't get me wrong, I'm … fine… with seeing you and all, but I have absolutely _no_ intentions of living with you."

My smile dropped. "What?"

He wrinkled his nose in disdain when he saw that his smokes were as soaked as himself, but then turned toward me with a sigh. "I like things as they are. I like my current home."

"Can I live with you then?" I immediately asked, not giving up. His eyebrows furrowed, for a moment he just eyed me, and I watched the water run from the edges of his hair and down his chin.

"No."

**oOo oOo oOo**

(_Hikaru POV)_

"Of course you can live with us!" Tamaki exclaimed, more in shock than agreement.

"WHAT!" I spat. My eyes narrowed in anger, and I shot Kaoru an angry glare, but he just sends me a huge grin. I pouted demonstratively. He had been following me the whole way home, not even blinking twice when I threatened to beat him up, even when I started running away he just followed along – turns out the guy are in pretty good shape.

"Come on Hikaru," Tamaki said, leaping an arm around my so-called-brother. At first the blonde had almost fainted when he saw Kaoru with the same face as mine, almost throwing a fit, but then he had seen our different clothes and immediately seen the difference - and Kaoru had explained that he was my "long lost brother" and bla bla bla. So. Now Tamaki just smiled at Kaoru like they were old friends. "He's like a puppy. Look at his cute face."

Kaoru gave him a weird look, but then just smiled.

"It's the same as mine!" I complained.

"Somehow his is cuter," Tamaki corrected me. I pouted and angrily passed him – bumping my shoulder into his on the way, to show how much I appreciated the idea.

Maybe I forgot to tell. I live with that blonde nut-head. It was cheaper to share rent, so I allowed him to share with me, but I had done nothing but regret it.

"Don't worry, he just needs to sulk a bit," I heard Tamaki tell Kaoru and violently slammed my door behind me. Shaking the whole apartment. Sulk? I didn't _sulk! _Who did he think he was to tell Kaoru that kind of things?

I grabbed my headphones and blasted my ears off with the loudest music I could find on my Ipod. I closed my eyes and drifted into my own little bubble of music. That's when _that person_ appeared in my mind, as always. It was always like this, I only wanted that one person at times like these, to care for me when no one else bothered.

Poke.

I fung my eyes open in shock when something touched me. Kaoru jumped back in surprise, forming words rapidly, but I couldn't hear anything with my headphones on.

"What?" I asked, pulling the devices off.

"-and I just- oh, you didn't hear me. I just said, sorry for startling you," he told me.

"Go away!" I demanded, pointing at the door angrily. He looked hurt, and I almost felt bad. Almost. Tamaki was right; he looked like a puppy – a face I probably couldn't mirror no matter how alike we looked.

"You know, you're being pretty unfair," Kaoru told me, making me rise an eyebrow in question. Kaoru looked outraged. "I just found you, after looking _forever, _and now you're just ignoring me?"

"I'm sorry I wasn't how you hoped," I snapped. Kaoru's arms crossed in a quick movement and his eyes narrowed.

"I'm sorry I wasn't how you hoped," he snapped back. I widened my eyes in surprise.

"Are you mimicking me?"

"Are you mimicking me?"

"That's so immature!"

"That's so immature!"

"Stop it!" I rose to my feet.

"Stop it!" Kaoru said and stepped closer to me.

"I mean it!" I said, lifting a finger.

"I mean it!" he said, lifting a finger as well.

"If you don't stop. Right now-" I spat.

"I will punch my fist through your skull," Kaoru ended.

_Silence._

When he realized what he had said his eyes widened to double size – and so did mine, actually I probably looked more shocked than him; because that was exactly the threat I had had planned in my head.

"H-how did you-?"

"-finish your sentence?" he ended, looking as shocked as I felt.

"Q-quit it!" I said half-heartily, still taken aback. "How do you do that?"

"Um, twin-thing," he suggested. I let out a mock-laugh until I realized he was serious.

"That's insane," I stated, but he just looked at me without a word. "I'm going to bed."

"Yeah, me too." Kaoru whispered, but then he suddenly realized something. "Um, where can I sleep?"

I immediately tensed. "Ask Tamaki, he's the one who invited you."

"Could I-"

"Don't even think about it!"

"You don't even know what-"

"I guess I _do_ have the twin-thing, and you're _not_ sleeping in my room!"

**oOo oOo oOo**

_(Kaoru POV)_

"Hikaru Hitachiin!" the teacher yelled, slamming a hand onto his table. His eyes jumped open and he let out a pained groan and straightened in his chair. I wince slightly, the whole class broke out in laughter. I had tried to wake him repeatedly, but he had been so far into slumber that it had been an impossible task.

He didn't seem bothered though; he just ignored the giggles and yawned loudly, stretching his arms far across the table like a cat. Did he really not care about what others thought of him – that could be a good thing, but it could also make him seem extremely antisocial.

Hikaru had allowed me to go to school with him – no that's wrong, I just went along anyway. But he had demanded that I wore a cab, glasses and one of his black hoodies, that smelled of smoke by the way. Because, and I quote, "he didn't want anyone to know he had a brother, because people talk."

I didn't get it, but I just went along anyway.

"Hikaru," I whispered, and he made a lazy movement toward me.

"Oh, it wasn't a nightmare, you're still here," he mumbled.

I pouted slightly, but shook the insult off quickly. "You dropped your pencil, over there." I pointed to where it had ended on the ground. He mumbled something under his breath before bending down toward it.

But suddenly another hand bent down after it too. Hikaru almost exclaimed a yelp in surprise when he looked at the person in front of him. I tilted my head slightly by the rare sight.

"Here," the girl said and handed him the pencil, which she had gotten to first.

"T-thanks," Hikaru stuttered, not keeping his eyes off her face. She nodded at him and turned back to pay attention to the teacher. Hikaru did the same, but his head was deeply lowered to hide the red color that was painting his cheeks.

I was stunned.

I had never thought he could show those emotions – he didn't seem like the type after how much I had learned about him. Somehow my chest ached a little. I might sound selfish on this one, but I had actually hoped to get a good brother relationship with Hikaru – a girlfriend would ... get in... the way. NO! What was I saying? That wasn't my business to mess with!

_Kaoru get to your senses! Hikaru has the right to fall in love with whomever he wants. That was absolutely none of my concern_. Right?

* * *

><p><strong>I don't think anyone who know Ouran <span>don't<span> know who the girl is. xD **

**ANSWERING-TIME:**

**aliisa-chan - (**lol, thanx. I'm happy that you think they're at least A LITTLE in character. hehe. And yeah, Hika threatened a random kid for money, poor person. xD)

**GoPlayInTrafficxox - (**I know right? I'm stunning myself with this update-rythem. You want to know the worst thing? I have tons of exsams and I'm just sitting and writing my stories in class. LOL! Who needs math I have HikaKao. xD And thanks for liking my cliffys, there will be lots more. ^^)

**lotlot - (**yes, Hikaru is definitely judgmental. But he is also very self-centeret and thinks he knows everything, that's why he believes he know what everyone thinks, when he doesn't. lol! And yeah, partners in crime, that could be a cute and yet very hot picture. ^_O)

**wishIwereanime - (**Oh, this won't be the last cliffhanger and if I'm following my current thought they'll be worse. hehe. ^^ And Of course I'll update for you. : D)

**ADeadBlackRose - (**thank you. : D Hope you'll stick around with me. ^^)

**KuroPika X - (**Well, who needs physics anyway, right? haha. ^^ I don't know if I should feel bad for making you skip your studying, or totally triumphant that I won over your teacher. :D And I have been there... the awkward biology class, you can learn much more about that stuff if you find the right stories on fanfic. LOL! ^_O thanks for reading as always. :D)

**MusicMixerGURL - (**glad you likey. ^^ and I did make a chapter 3, it's right above this. ^^)

**lillygien - (**Sorry for cutting it off, but if you knew my style, you would know that that's what I do. hehe. ^_^ But nooo, I broke your heart, so you want a bandage for that? O_O hehe, anyway, I love you already and hope you'll stay with me on future chapters. *kisses right back*. :D)

**OuranFire - (**Yeah, poor Hikaru was betrayed by his hoodie. lol. ^^ haha, you made me laugh so much with the "swag"-Hika, that looks so hilarious in my head. oh my god I'm dying in laughter. xDD Glad you like merry little Kaoru. And I don't know why, but I have started to write Tamaki as the best friend in a lot of my HikaKao stories lately, dunno why. xD haha)

**Hikaru-and-Kaoru-Love - (**Thanx for the love. ;) I hope I can make you go even CRAZIER in the future. hehe. ^_O)

**Midnight Custard - (**Well in the future Kaoru will... wait! I won't tell you! You have to read. :D Lol, sorry, I have such bad humor, hehe. ^^ And I promise I wont make Kaoru too much of a wimpy-loser. Yell at me if it happens. haha)


	4. Chapter 3

**Chapter 3**

**Love sees sharply, hatred sees even more sharp, **

**But jealousy sees the sharpest, **

**for it is love and hatred at the same time.**

- **Arab Proverb **

_(Kaoru POV)_

"Oh yes, Hikaru have been in love with Haruhi since she gave him a slap across the face in biology," Tamaki told me. So that was her name, Haruhi.

"_Since_? How long have he had that crush?" I asked, poking my cafeteria food absentminded with my fork. Hikaru hadn't showed up for lunch yet, so I had actually gotten to talk with Tamaki about the situation that had happened earlier in class. The blonde eyed me a little and shrugged.

"Um, about two years, maybe two and a half."

"What?" I spat stunned, pointing my fork at him. "Are you telling me that he have loved the same girl for almost three years without telling her."

"No, without even talking to her, I have never seen so one-sided love in my life," Tamaki grinned. "He's an idiot really. When she shows up he just bail from the room, unless they have a class together."

That explains the blush, but still, it sounded crazy. "Why not?"

"Beats me, I have talked to her plenty, she's nice," Tamaki explained, throwing a chip in the air and catching it with his mouth. He spread his arms triumphant when he caught it and I gave him weak thumbs up. But I still couldn't believe what he had told me, Hikaru hadn't even _spoken_ to her in all that time?

"Oh hey," I heard Tamaki exclaim when Hikaru appeared in the distance. I looked up, waving a little, but only getting a glance in return. Hikaru only had milk in his hand when he sat down at our table.

"Aren't you going to have food?" I asked quietly, Hikaru opened his mouth to answer, but Tamaki beat him to it.

"Oh, Hikaru doesn't eat, he smokes too much," Tamaki teased.

"Shut up!" Hikaru snapped, opening his milk roughly. "I'm just not hungry today, that's all."

"Is Haruhi in the food line?" Tamaki joked. Hikaru hissed in a breath in annoyance, but didn't deny it and Tamaki let out a laugh. "You wimp."

"I said, shut up!" he yelled, scowling at his friend and then back at me. "What?"

I didn't realize I had been staring and lowered my gaze. "Nothing." I mumbled, sighing slightly. This really wasn't what I had thought about when I had wanted a brother-relationship. Hikaru was so cold that I had to ask his friends about his thoughts.

"I'm going to the bathroom," I told them and stood up. Both boys just nodded and continued their discussion.

I wandered across the room with my hands in the pockets. Who would have thought that I would end in this kind of situation? I had ended in jail, found my brother – finding out he was also my _twin_-, and now I was in this weird drama-thing. And I still hadn't told Hikaru why I had tried to find him in the first place.

As I walked there dreamily and pitied myself, I didn't even notice the petite girl who was rushing across the floor, yelling something to her friend absentminded. She was running directly toward me. I barely had a chance to lift my head before she ran directly into me.

"Haruhi! Watch out!" One of her friends screamed, but it was too late.

"WOAH!" She whined stunned, tripping backwards with her tray.

I reacted out of reflex, grabbing her wrist and pulling her back up. For a second I thought I had saved the situation, but then her legs caught in my own and she ended up pushing _me_ backwards, hitting the floor hard. Really hard, and I saw red as a flicker of light. And at the same time her tray with food splattering over us both; Pasta with meatballs, of course.

"S-shit!" I exclaimed, feeling a cold numbness in my head, spreading slowly before the pain exploded as scratching punches against my brain. My glasses and hat had fallen off, lying on the floor across the room, and I felt a warm sticky liquid run down my neck. Fuck.

"I'm so, _so_ sorry," The girl babbled, jumping off me immediately and kneeling beside me, to lay a hand on the side of my cheek. "Are you alright? Oh… Hikaru? Oh no, you're bleeding!" I finally noticed that it was the girl from the class; the one Hikaru was in love with, Haruhi.

I was too shocked to correct the name she had called me and just ran a hand along my neck and pulled it in front of my eyes. Sure enough, I was bleeding. Perfect. I felt a little dizzy, but then again, who wouldn't?

People had stopped moving around us and stared mesmerized on the crimson scene. I blushed furiously, not knowing how I could have more blood in my face to blush.

"I'll take you to the nurse," Haruhi said panicking, I opened my mouth, but she insisted again and flung my arm around her small shoulders and forced me to my feet. The pasta and meatballs fell off our clothes, only leaving red stains on our clothes. Hikaru's poor smoking hoodie was officially ruined. I saw white dots dancing before my eyes when I had to move, and almost fainted. "Hikaru, are you okay?" she checked, stopping shortly.

"Y-yeah, fine," I mumbled.

I looked to the side quickly, seeing Tamaki and Hikaru standing among the crowd and watching me wide-eyed. Tamaki looked concerned and horrified, and Hikaru looked like he had just seen a ghost. Actually he looked more at my hand around Haruhi's shoulder, than at me.

Somehow that made me annoyed. I _was_ his brother; he was allowed to be just _slightly_ concerned.

"Hikaru, are you sure you're alright?" Haruhi asked me again, and I looked down at her concerned face.

"Um, yeah, I'm fine," I murmured. Then something hit me.

Hikaru hadn't been talking to this girl in three years, maybe I should help him a little, then he had to be grateful and I would finally be able to see him open up to me. Yes, good plan.

Therefore I staggered after Haruhi to the nurse office. Dizzy and wounded, but still grinning inside.

**oOo oOo oOo**

When she got be dragged to the infirmary though, the nurse pretty much ruined my plan.

"That's quite a hit you got yourself there. It doesn't seem to have hurt you fatally, but I would keep your head steady for a while so the wound wont open," the large nurse said, moving some of my hair away to get a better look. I bit my lip in pain, trying not to scream out when she started to rub some alcoholic cleaning medicine into my wound. Haruhi stood quietly up against the walls and looked guilty as hell, while my eyes turned teary in torment.

"So," I forced out, catching her attention. "You're in my math class, correct?" my voice was weak and forced, but she nodded regardless.

"Yeah, I am, I'm Haruhi."

"Oh, I know."  
>"What?"<p>

"Nothing."

I winced when the nurse started to pat the back of my head free from blood with some piece of cloth. She really wasn't gentle to me, I think she had a secret grudge against me or something – but who knows how many grudged Hikaru had collected anyway.

"So," I said once again, and this time she smiled a bit. "How are you lately?"

"How I am?" she asked, almost laughing. "Why?"

"I was just wondering what you do in your spare time, except knocking people over in the cafeteria," I smiled. She furrowed her eyebrows slightly and looked down with a strained smile.

"Um, well. Hikaru, I appreciate that you ask, but-" she ran a hand through her hair. "Why are you suddenly interested in me as a person?"

"What do you mean?" I asked carefully. The nurse sighed behind me.

"Leave the poor girl alone, can't you see she doesn't want to associate with people like you?" the lady snapped mercilessly and grabbed a bandage on the table to wrap around my head.

"No, no. It's not like that," Haruhi whispered, playing with her fingers uncomfortably. "It's just-"

"What?" I said stunned. My brother wasn't _that_ bad! He wasn't!

"Well," she flung her hands out a bit. "You're just not a person I would get along with, that's all."

"Why would you say that?" I snapped, suddenly getting angry and clenched my fists. "I'm not a bad person! I might be simple-minded and a little cold at times, but that's no reason to push me away! I know for a fact, that I am a very nice person, actually I just saved my brother the other day – and he's very thankful for that by the way."

"Hikaru, you have bullied countless people on this school-"  
>"Have <em>not<em>! They probably provoked me, or people didn't hear my side of the story. I would never bully anyone without a reason," I had without realizing it raised my voice. I flickered my eyes to the ground, my blood boiling with anger.

There was a long moment of silence. The nurse had stopped wrapping my head in bandages and you could probably hear a needle dropping on the floor at the moment.

I gritted my teeth. This girl didn't deserve my brother at all, she was a horrible person. I didn't know why I defended my brother so much, I had no idea what he had done on this school, but I just couldn't believe it. I wouldn't.

"Hikaru, I never knew you felt like that," Haruhi broke the silence.

I swallowed without a word, shaking my head. If I talked to this girl any longer I would end up punching her, and that would probably not be a popular conversation with Hikaru. So I did the most reasonable thing I could think of: I rose from my seat, grabbing the bandages and pressing them against my wound before bailing for the door.

"Hey, I need to bind those properly around your head!" the nurse yelled after me. "Your wound will open up!"

"Hikaru, hold on!" Haruhi yelled, but I just slammed the door roughly behind me.

**oOo oOo oOo**

_(Hikaru POV)_

I walked though the halls absentminded. Kaoru hadn't shown up to any of our classes after lunch, after crushing his skull into the floor and getting helped by… Haruhi. Just the name made my lips tighten, I pulled a little in my backpack. He could surely find home by himself, he didn't need a babysitter – hopefully, because I wasn't being one.

When I slugged out of the main entrance with all the other over-excited students, I noticed a figure sitting by the end of the stair in the far right side. People gave him weird glances, but no one stopped. His auburn hair was sticky in the back and he clumsily pressed a piece of red cloth against it. When he looked up his eyes brightened a bit, but his smile was weak and strained.

"Hey," he whispered. I furrowed my eyebrows and walked toward him.

"What are you doing here, and why are your bandages not properly put on?" I asked stunned, gesturing to him with a hand, looking at his pitiful eyes avoiding my gaze. "You're freaking bleeding, what-"

"The nurse was… Unhelpful, I guess," my twin got out exhausted.

"What? What did she- you know what, never mind, let's get you home," I decided and grabbing his arm. If he continued sitting there he was going to bleed to death.

"Wait wait! Stop!" Kaoru babbled and collapsed halfway up.

"What?" I stuttered shocked. The last students were passing us now, leaving the grounds empty. Except a few kids who stayed to smoke by the entrance.

"I can't stand, I get dizzy," my brother told me.

"Wh- are you telling me you're that badly hurt?" I yelled at him, outraged. He looked down and I ran both hands through my hair in frustration. "Gezz! Kid, take care of yourself for gods' sake! What if I hadn't seen you? You would have been sitting here all night! What were you thinking?"

"I'm sorry," he mumbled, closing his eyes and loosing hold around the cloth against his head.

"Wow!" I spat, catching it before it slipped from him and pressed it against his head. My eyes widened, my hands got soaked in blood, just my holding the cloth. "Kaoru, you need a doctor."

"No, I'm-"

"You're not fine."

"Are we really doing the twin-thing again?" he joked, laughing raspingly. I swallowed and looked at him. He was a mess. His hair sticky with dried blood, my hoodie was stained with dark spots from lunch and if you looked closely you could even see the dry blood on his neck. And he was pale, too pale.

"I'm calling an ambulance," I decided, pulling out my phone.

"I talked to Haruhi," he suddenly said, making my fingers pause on the numbers. "She's not worth it Hikaru. I'm serious, please, she's not worth it."

I took in a deep breath, calming myself, before calmly saying. "Try not to talk." I dialed the three easy numbers and pressed the phone to my ear.

"I pretended to be you, Hikaru. To help," he told me, and I widened my eyes in shock.

"You did _wha- _I mean, hallo!" I spat stunned when a female voice answered the phone. "Y-yes, my name is Hikaru Hitachiin, I need an ambulance." I listened to her answer and nodded in understanding. I quickly have her the address and hung up.

"I mean it," Kaoru said again, now sounding far away. "She's not a good person."

"Kaoru, please stop talking!" I spat, now getting angry. "I never said I liked her, why would you talk to her _as me_? Please don't meddle in business that doesn't concern you." Look where it got him. That idiot.

Kaoru looked at me with hurt eyes. I looked back and sighed. He really looked pitiful like this, but he was my... brother, and for some strange reason I felt a connection between us.

"I'm cold," he suddenly said, his eyes focusing on me. "I'm freezing actually."

"The ambulance will be here soon," I reassured him, patting his shoulder awkwardly. Then, out of nowhere, his hand shot up and grabbed mine. I winced a little in surprise, but didn't move to much.

"Your hands are warm," he mumbled.

"Kaoru, you're talking like a madman, try to relax," I mumbled, not knowing what to do. Kaoru let out an exhausted sigh, but did as I said. He closed his eyes and breathed in slowly, I noticed the rasping edge in his breathings, but didn't say anything.

"H-how are you feeling?" I asked after a while. His breathings concerned me greatly, where was that ambulance?

"I thought I shouldn't talk," Kaoru joked raspingly, but I didn't laugh.

"Just… hang on, alright," I whispered, looking at the bandage that was completely red. How much blood did a human have? 5-8 liters? Depending on the size… and how much had Kaoru lost already? Too much. I hesitantly laid my hand on his shoulder and he immediately snuggled into my shoulder. I hissed in a breath when the blood spread on my shoulder. His wound had opened, badly.

I was one second from panicking, but then I finally heard the faint sound of a siren and licked my lips. "The ambulance is here. Kaoru, can you hear that?"

No answer. I looked over and saw small drops of seat form on his forehead, and his breathings were deeper and more strained.

"Kaoru?" I mumbled and looked at his face. He looked like he was sleeping, or having a nightmare, and he was way too pale. "Kaoru, are you there?" I said a little louder. _Bonk_, and his head felt from my shoulder to my knee. I let out a surprised gasp, and hurried to grab around his head and helped him sitting back up, holding a hand by his head and one on his shoulder. "Kaoru! Answer me!" I now shouted.

"Mmm, yeah, I'm here," he whispered, barely moving his lips. "I'm so tired."

"Tired? It's the middle of the day," I told him, patting him lightly on the cheek. "Hey, I take it back. Don't rest! Open your eyes. Come on."

"But I'm… so tired," he breathed out wearily, still with closed eyes.

"Kaoru?" I called, patting his cheek a little quicker. "Come on, it isn't funny. You're- you're scaring me."

"I'll just sleep for a little bit," he murmured and suddenly his whole body felt limb next to me.

"Kaoru! Kaoru!" I called, seeing the doctors emerge from the ambulance. I looked up and waved my free hand. "Over here!" I yelled and they immediately approached me.

I looked back at my brother. "See Kaoru, look! The ambulance arrived, you can sleep at the hospital, just wake up for now."

No answer. If I hadn't been able to hear his rasping breathings I would have thought he was dead. I bit my lip and patted his cheek again, but now a man grabbed around my brother.

"Come," he said, gesturing me to help him and I immediately hurried to my feet, dropping the bandage from his head. I almost groaned in shock when I saw the calloused backside of his head. I had heard that head wounds bleed badly, but this was… bad.

"When did this happen?" the man asked me, and it took me a while to comprehend the question as I hurried after him, while he carried my brother in his arms.

"Um, well, at lunch… around twelve or something," I got out.

"So long? Why hasn't he gotten earlier treatment?" the man asked stunned.

"He has- he was supposed to, I don't know," I murmured truthfully. It was like the world were running in slow motion and it was hard for me to think about anything at all. I had never seen so much blood, or felt so concerned for a person I barely even knew. It was so many emotions at once that I almost felt sick – no, literally _sick_.

"Do you want to go with us in the ambulance? To be with your brother," the man asked me. I stared at Kaoru getting carried into the ambulance with wide eyes. "Kid?" the man said, patting my shoulder lightly.

I snapped back, but my world still moved in slow-motion. I quickly shook my head. "No. I don't want to go."

The man nodded understanding. "Do you have anyone to pick you up?"

"Y-yeah, yes," I lied.

"Alright," the man said, jumping into the ambulance next to my brother. The doors closed and I stood back on the road, staring after the car until I couldn't see it anymore.

Then I looked at my hands that was still soaked in Kaoru's warm blood, as well as my clothes. The picture of his tormented head kept showing up in my head as a never ending clip.

Then I felt nauseous. My legs collapsed under me and it felt like someone was pulling roughly in my stomach, forcing it up my throat. I grabbed around myself, feeling my body shake in discomfort. My bloody hands fell flat on the ground and I stared at the asphalt beneath with teary eyes.

And then I emptied my stomach on the cold rocks.

* * *

><p><strong>Hope you liked and please review me your thoughts. :D <strong>

**People that I appreciate!:**

**intricate-bindings - (**yes, that stupid Haruhi. LOL! And I use her to make some drama, and to exspand the plot a bit, it's getting much worse. heh. and I have never read stories with Haruhi as a guy. :b I'll look that up for sure. ^^ Thank you for reviewing. :D )

**wishIwereanime - (**Raindow-fabulous even, thaaank yoou. :D Always a pleasure! I'm trying to not to rush it too much, but it's hard because I have so many ideas that I'm pressing into a chapter. ^^)

**GoPlayInTrafficxox - (**Yeah, exsams may die, will you help me bury the body? lol! But yeah, Hikaru have never had a Kaoru in his life, so he doesn't know. : D Thank you for reviewing. ^^)

**KyubiKanji (**Yay, you're reading again! :D Hope you'll stick around a little longer. ^^)

**brings074065- (**Yeah, Hikaru is already in love and Kaoru is jalouse - without knowing it of course. :b Thank you for reading. :D)

**Lunar Orphan - (**Aw, thank you! I'm happy you like my stuff, that makes me a happy writer. ^_^ Haha, I'm happy you liked the twin-thing, I just felt like the chapter was a little dull, so I added a little twinie scene. lol! And I KNOW, I'm always so mean to Kao in my stories. xDD Now I have even given him a wound in the head. I'm sorry, I really DO love him. x) haha... thanks for reviewing.)

**OuranFire - (**Tamaki's personality is just like the loyal best friend who knows when he should support, and doesn't leave even if it gets rough. That's what I tried to portray him as, anyway. xD I don't know if I failed epically. And yeah, I don't know a good word that would explain Kaoru's personality perfectly. xD Thank you so much for reviewing. :D)


	5. Chapter 4

**ATTENTION! PLEASE!**

**A lot of you have had problems reading this chapter, because of some annoying error on fanfic. DX**

**Therefore I re-uploaded it, for all of you. :D**

**If you are not one of these people, I apologize... you have already read this. XD **

**- LUV YA ALL, ValeurStories. **

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><p><strong><span>Chapter 4<span>**

**If things go wrong, don't go with them. **

**~Roger Babson**

(_Hikaru POV_)

I don't know how long I just stood there. Staring at him. He had been in the hospital all night, and now he just sat casually in the sofa when I entered the apartment, like nothing had happened. The only reassurance that the event had happened was the white bandage wrapped tightly around one side of his head.

"Kaoru?" I spat shocked, dropping my bag on the floor with a loud thud. His eyes quickly flung to the bag that had made the sound and then leveled with mine. At first he looked stunned, but then he smiled and lifted a slow hand in greeting. I furrowed my eyebrows, continuously staring at him.

"Something wrong?" he mumbled awkwardly and lowered his hand.

"No," I finally said, shaking myself back to reality. "No. Nothing's wrong." I grabbed my bag from the floor and hurried into my room. I threw the bag across the floor and closed the door behind me, leaning my back against the wood and grabbing tightly around my shirt.

He was all right. He really was, I couldn't believe I had spent the last 24 hours worrying about him. How stupid of me. I really was an idiot.

BANG!

"Fuck!" I gasped out in surprise when a knock on the door sounded loudly just beside my ear. I jumped away from the door and watched it open slowly.

"Sorry, I didn't mean to startle you," Kaoru whispered, peeking in, before entering.

"It's …fine," I murmured, walking away from the door, keeping my back to him constantly. I heard his steps slowly entering the room. Then he stopped, and I wondered how he stood.

Was he looking at me? At my Room? Was he looking at his feet or hands? I really wanted to know.

"Hikaru," he said slowly, and I turned my head slightly so I could look at him. What I saw stunned me; he was looking straight at the floor, his eyebrows furrowed. He looked like he was concentrating hard on telling something and it caught my curiosity.

"What is it?" I asked, now turning all the way to look at his features.

"I- I didn't just look for you because of boredom," he told me, I was startled - he was going right to the point - now looking up and directly in my eyes. "I didn't come to be involved in your love life, your problems, to get involved in your school, meet your friends or anything like that…"

"What are you trying to-"

"I'm not done!" he spat, lifting a finger toward me and I obediently shut my mouth. I had never thought Kaoru could wear such a face, and it had come out of nowhere. "You see," he continued, lowering his finger. "I don't have any family left, besides you. So that's why I thought I would meet you. I wanted to know you before…" he stopped himself.

"Before what?" I questioned carefully, afraid to be scolded for talking again.

"Before… I take off," he ended.

"You're leaving?" I asked carefully. "Where are you going?"

"… Foreign place," he murmured, running a hand through his hair. "Far away."

"Well, good luck with that," I said shortly. I was bad with emotions, so I decided just to leave it at that, but halfway Kaoru grabbed my wrist stubbornly.

"Hikaru," he whispered, and his tone stopped me instantly. "I don't regret meeting you. And I'm not disappointed in who you turned out to be." I turned and was about to give him a snappy comment, but cut myself off.

"Are you crying?" I spat stunned.

"I guess I am," Kaoru just choked out, letting go of me to wipe the tears away. He looked so fragile like that. I felt an urge to grab him around the shoulders and pull him into a tight hug, feeling his body close to mine and protect him, but… of course I didn't.

"I'll make you some coffee if you want?" I said, making the moment much more awkward than it already was, but Kaoru just shook his head.

"No thank you," he sobbed, drying his cheeks a last time before looking up at me with a weak smile. "Anyway, I'm done with all the emotions so I'm going to bed."

"What? It's four in the afternoon?"

"Yeah, but the doctor told me to get lots of sleep," he explained, suddenly sounding cheerful again. I couldn't really figure this kid out sometimes. I had a gut-feeling that he was hiding something from me.

* * *

><p>"Hikaru, hold on!" I heard someone yell after me, and slowly turned around. I had been so caught up in my thoughts about Kaoru that I hadn't even noticed the petite girl running toward me. We stood in the hallway and a lot of people were rushing around us to get to class.<p>

My eyes widened in panic when she approached me. "H-Haruhi … hi." _Should I run_?

"Hey, how's your head?" she asked me concerned. I opened my mouth in confusion, when I remembered that Kaoru had pretended to be me that time he had calloused his head. For a moment I considered telling her the truth, but in the end I just smiled awkwardly.

"Um, it's much better," I murmured.

"Well, I just wanted to apologize for the other day in the infirmary, I was really rude," she said and looked at me with big eyes. I snapped a breath and scratched the back on my head.

"Oh, that is totally okay. No worries. Not a problem, at all," I grinned dumbly. "But, er, what exactly was it you said, again?"

"You-" she asked, furrowing her eyebrows. "You don't remember, do you?"

"Um, you see, I hit my head pretty hard," I uttered, feeling my cheeks flush. This was so embarrassing, but I was really curious. Kaoru hadn't given me a hint of their/_our_ conversation at all.

"Never mind then," Haruhi said, looking almost as flustered as myself. "If you don't recall, I guess there's no problem. We should get to class." She nodded to herself, as if she said that more to herself than to me.

She gave me a last smile and walked around me quickly. I couldn't believe I had finally talked to her, for the first time in three years. I couldn't let her go! DAMN IT HIKARU! Get yourself together and run after her. Yell, stamp your foot, something!

I turned.

_Do it!_

I bit my lip.

_Do it now!_

I watched her back. She was about to walk around the corner.

_Damn it! Now!_

I opened my mouth, but no sound escaped. She was almost out of view.

_DO IT! DO IT! _

"HARUHI!" I shouted as loud as my lungs could manage. The girl stopped in her steps and looked at me – but so did everyone else in the hallway. There was a long moment of silence, and I heard a few people snigger by the awkwardness.

I took a deep breath to calm myself. Hearing a few girls whisper beside me, but ignoring them.

"D-do you," I stuttered, feeling my cheeks burn up from the inside. "Want to… um, go out with.. um, me?" My voice got quieter for every word I said and by the last one my head was completely bent over and I stared horrified at the floor. The whispers continued, louder now.

"Hikaru, I-" I heard her stutter, and I knew what she was going to say. She would reject me, I could feel it deep inside by the tone of her voice, and in front of all these people too. I wanted to die, I couldn't take it. I felt sick.

I had been thinking about this moment for so long, but never imagined a scenery like this. My stomach tightened, and I had never felt like crying in public. I wasn't this kind of person, I didn't turn weak so easily – and yet I found my legs shaking, my eyes heating and my mind spinning.

If this was love, I hated it.

"Excuse me," I whispered and turned around, not even looking her way. To my horror she didn't even shout my name, and the last thing I heard was the chuckles of people around me. Glad I had given them some gossip to spread.

Fuck! I hated this.

I tried to walk away calmly, but I soon felt my eyes bursting and hurried to pull my hood over my head to hide my features. No one could see me like this. I started running when I rounded a corner. People that hadn't witnessed my embarrassment gave me weird looks as I passed them.

My feet hit the hallways loudly, and I bumped into a girl in my way, not bothering to apologize or even glance back. Finally I could see the exit door. I could get away, to hell with classes.

"Hikaru?" a surprised voice exclaimed. I looked up slightly, and met a pair of similar golden eyes, filled with worry. How the hell did he show up everywhere I went? Kaoru looked at me with a confused expression as he spoke again. "What are you doing?"

I held his gaze for a long time, and he immediately noticed something was wrong. "What is it?" he demanded to know and stepped closer. I winced and gave him a scowl.

"Get away from me," I hissed at him, but unfortunately there was an edge of sadness in the words that Kaoru didn't miss. He reached a hesitant hand toward me.

"Are you crying?" he whispered, looking stunned and horrified. "Tell me what's wr-"

"_Get away from me_!" I yelled, slapping his hand away. I felt a traitorous tear slip out of my eye and wiped it away quickly, before spinning around and heading for the exit with long steps. Hoping I had scared him away, but I wasn't that lucky.

"H-hold on!" Kaoru exclaimed, following me close behind. I knew from experience that it wouldn't help to run away from him, he was much faster than I was. So instead I used a tactic that I had never used before.

When we were outside I pulled him with me behind the school, away from curious eyes and stared at him. Not holding back my emotions anymore; my eyes twisted in sadness and I probably looked ridiculous on the edge of crying.

"Please leave me alone," I told him, trying to remain calm. Kaoru looked stunned by my character-change and took a step back.

"What happened?" he spat.

"Please, please leave me alone," I sobbed and felt my legs turn weak underneath me. I hadn't cried in so long, that I felt like I was going to burst. But I wouldn't cry in front of Kaoru, I just wouldn't. So I needed him to leave.

"Is it Haruhi?"

_Please stop talking, Kaoru._

"You finally told her your feelings, didn't you?"

_You're torturing me, _please_ stop. _

"It's alright to be sad Hikaru," Kaoru said, and then he placed his hands on my shoulders and pulled me into a hug, the hug I hadn't been able to give _him_ when he had been sad. I stood stiff for a long moment, clenching my eyes tightly together in torment, and then I clenched my fingers into the back of his shirt.

I couldn't hold it back anymore. It hurt so much. I felt like my chest was being ripped open, and somehow Kaoru's embrace was triggering all the tears.

"I'm such an idiot," I cried out. "She didn't even think twice about rejecting me. I'm so stupid!" Kaoru didn't say anything, he just held me. I felt my legs giving up under me and I pulled Kaoru down with me. I sobbed loudly into his shoulder, hiding my face in his chest. I felt hidden in his embrace, my hood hid my hair and his shoulder hid my face. I felt so safe right there.

His soft hands started to stroke circles on my back and I cried a little more. All the tears streamed down my face, soaking his shirt, and I sobbed weakly. Biting my lip so I wouldn't be too loud.

"I won't leave you, Hikaru," he suddenly said, making me clench around his shoulders harder. "I promise I won't ever hurt you."

"You better keep that promise," I sobbed out. "Or I'll kill you."

"Deal," Kaoru chuckled lightly, and his head softly rested on the top of mine.

I pulled away slightly to look at my twin. His eyes were soft, and his smile broad, but somehow sad. That… is when I noticed the thin stripe of blood that spilled from his mouth.

* * *

><p><strong>AN: A bet a lot of you are wondering where I have been... Well, I have been sick. Hospitalized to be exact, that's why I haven't ben able to post as often as I would like. It's a long and boring story. :D**


	6. Chapter 5

******Chapter 5**

The richest man is not he who has the most,

but he who needs the least.

—Unknown Author

(_Kaoru POV_)

"Deal," I chuckled lightly, and my head softly rested on the top of Hikaru. I couldn't believe I had made him open up – he was actually telling me his feelings. I had never been this happy.

Then I felt a familiar pulling in my chest and pulled away slightly. Hikaru stared at me with flustered eyes, but then they suddenly widened in horror.

"Kaoru, is that blood?" he whispered.

I gently touched my lip and looked at the red color. for a long moment I just looked. Wondering if I should be truthful, but then I looked back at Hikaru. He was devastated... he couldn't handle it.

"I just bit my tongue." I lied with a laugh and grinned at my brother. He looked skeptical, measuring my features carefully. "Come on," I laughed. "I know something that will cheer you up."

Hikaru looked at me with careful and alert eyes, but didn't resist when I pulled him up from the ground and hurried him with me.

"Kao, I don't really feel like-"

"What did you call me?"

"…"

"You called me Kao, didn't you?" I laughed, smiling widely.

"Sorry…"

"No, it's a good thing," I insisted and wore a wicked smile. "Hika."

Hikaru winced.

* * *

><p>With two steaming hot coffees in his hands, Hikaru came toward me with an annoyed expression on.<p>

"I thought you wanted to cheer me up, and yet you make _me_ pay for the drinks," he complained, and I gave him an innocent smile in return.

"I don't have any money," I told him and received my coffee.

"What do you mean? You have plenty when you got here," he murmured to himself.

"Well- OUCH!" I exclaimed when I took a sip of the hot drink. I sat it down and stuck my tongue out. "Hot! Hot!" I stuttered and waved my hands at my tongue, even though it didn't help at all. Hikaru sniggered.

"That's called karma, now you can't taste the rest of the coffee," Hikaru laughed malicious.

"Yur a jerwk (you're a jerk)," I laughed, still with my tongue stuck out and put my coffee back on the table so it could cool. I glanced at it for a while, and when I looked up and blinked twice in surprise. I pulled my tongue back in my mouth, "Hikaru, are you alright?"

He jumped slightly in surprise. "Huh? Sorry, I most have spaced out," Hikaru spats awkwardly, and in a flash the sad expression that I had just seen was replaced by a happy smile. I looked at the table for a while, gathering my courage before I asked.

"Still thinking about Haruhi?" I guessed and Hikaru was, once again, stunned by my ability to look through him again. It made my chuckle.

"Well, err…" Hikaru stuttered.

"Just forget her, and stay by me," I thought to myself. Then I realized I had said it out loud and my eyes flew to Hikaru panicking. "Um, I-" Hikaru stared at me with a flustered expression, I held his gaze for a long time. Had I said something over the edge?

"I need to use the bathroom," he suddenly said.

"Um," I spat, lifting a hand toward him, but he had already rushed out of his seat. I looked after him for a long time. I felt a tightening in my chest. I couldn't tell him, but I ... I was really happy that Haruhi had finally rejected him.

Because... well, I don't know when it happened, but I had started devoloping strange feelings around Hikaru. I had noticed the littel things he does. He furrows his eyebrows slightly when he thinks hard, he likes to cover his face with a hood when he's uncomfortable, and he make that cute little special frown when he's hiding his happiness. I knew that, and I knew my feelings...

But I couldn't tell him that... or ...

(_Hikaru POV_)

I splashed water in my face and took some deep breathings.

What the hell? That had been way to direct. He could just have pierced knives through my heart. "_Just forget about her_"? What was he thinking? It wasn't that easy.

But then I remembered the second part of his sentence, "_and stay by me_". _stay by me. Stay by Kaoru..._

Wait why was I blushing? Stupid. I shook my head wildly.

"Hikaru," a voice sounded and I realized Kaoru had been following me to the bathroom. His eyes flickered across the room until they found me. I sighed and turned around slowly.

"Kaoru, I really don't want to ta-"

After that things became… strange.

I opened my mouth to tell him to leave me alone, when he suddenly crossed the room in two longs steps and grabbed my face between his palms. And kissed me.

"MUHHM?" I spat surprised into his mouth. I staggered backwards, and he followed until the sinks stopped us. When my back hit the glass Kaoru broke away from me.

"I love you."

"K-Kaoru," I stuttered and stared at him with dazed eyes. "We're _brothers_." His hands clenched around my shirt and he hid his face in my shirt.

"It doesn't matter. Love is love."

"What are you saying all of a sudden?" I rambled, I couldn't figure it out. My head was spinning and I felt a horribly familiar feeling in my pan- wait, you didn't read that!

Kaoru lifted his face, staring at me with pleading eyes. "People have phobias for homosexuals, and they will have for brothers as well, but it doesn't matter," Kaoru exclaimed, reaching for another kiss, but I stopped him by pushing him away by the shoulders.

"Hold on!" I almost shouted. "Why this, all of a sudden? I mean…" I made frustrated hand movements in my search for a word. "… Why now? Why so …_now?_"

Kaoru looked at me with frightened eyes. "Because, what I feel is not fake and…" he looked down and I became alert.

"What? What is it?" I breathed out, awaiting the worst, but never as bad, as what he said.

"I'm... maybe... going to die. Soon."

* * *

><p><strong>Argh this is sooo short. xD Next will be longer - and probably the final too. :O <strong>

**People-that-I-LOOOOVE:**

**aliisa-chan (**Thank you, you always leave short, but supportive reviews, I appreciate it. :D)

**Chibiforte13 (**Blood is indeeeed a bad thing. ;) You have an adorable avatar BTW. ^^)

**OuranFire (**I know, there have been that annoying error. GEZZ! ... lol, that makes me think of our misunderstanding-message. lol. xD And yes, the world would surely go under of Kao wasn't there, but yeah.. xD)

**GoPlayInTrafficxox **(Well, you'll figure out about Kao in the next chappy, and I'm perfectly fine, I just have a weak body. ^^)

**ADeadBlackRose (**Thank you for the support. :D)

**Hikaru-and-Kaoru-Love (**Yayz, thank you. I'm happy you're going crazy - lol, don't misunderstand. *grins* ^_^)

**Midnight Custard (**Lol, yeah, don't they always hook up in my stories. xD thanx for reviewing.)

**brings074065 (**Oh, you're one of my anonymous reviewers. I'm sorry I haven't been able to answer your reviews in the last chappy *bows head*, but I will now. :D Thank you for the love and review. ^_^/)

**wishIwereanime (**LOL! Thank you, I always end making angsty stuff in my stories. xDD)


	7. Chapter 6

**ATTENTION!**

**This fanfiction may not be copied ****and/or used on other sites. **©

**Yes, somebody did do it, grrr! X_x**

* * *

><p><strong><span>Chapter 6<span> ©**

"Don't cry because it's over, smile because it happened."

― Dr. Seuss

(Hikaru POV)

Kaoru didn't come home that night. Or the night after that.

After the scene at the bathroom, I had yelled at him. Called him names, and scolded him in fury. I hadn't meant to hurt him though, but a combo of Haruhi rejecting me, and the shock of my brothers confession + the fact he was going to "_die_ soon", had not been a good mix. The scene at the bathroom was repeating in my brain constantly, and I couldn't do anything to stop it.

_"I'm… maybe… going to die. Soon." Kaoru uttered and my mind clicked. It took me various second to figure out the meaning of his words. He looked at me with worried and nervous eyes, awaiting my reaction. _

_I wanted to yell – no scream – at him! I wanted to grab his shoulders and shake him violently. How could he drop a bomb like that so suddenly, why did he have to complicate my life so greatly. _

_"And you think..." I said coldly and without even thinking about it, I pushed him away from me. My temper and emotions were both running wild. "...that just because..." I pushed him further away, looking at his stunned eyes as I did so. "…You say a lie like that, I will turn gay for you?" _

_I pushed him the last way into the wall. Kaoru's eyes were wide in shock, before they twisted in pain; he steadied himself with both palms against the wall and slowly opened his mouth. _

_"I… didn't lie and-"  
>"Shut up!" I interrupted and slammed my hand into the wall, right next to his face. He made a little shocked jump and winced. <em>

_"I know you're stressed, but I never-"_

_"I don't want to hear it!" I yelled, staring at him angrily. "You come here, practically storms into my life, and expect me to just accept you? I have never accepted you! I hate you!"_

_"But, you made me promise-"_

_"The promise is taken back!" I shouted and moved away from him. He stared at me, hurt and flustered, but then he swallowed and closed his eyes. _

_ "I never lied, about anything," he whispered, looking at me with a forced seriousness. "I _do_ love you, I _am_ going to die and I _will_ support you to the end. No matter what. Even if you hate me."_

_"Leave!" I exclaimed, pointing at door._

_"I intend to, but you can always call-"_

_"I said.. _go_!" I got out, but to my annoyance my voice cracked on the last word._

_Kaoru ran his eyes up and down me, before he sighed and walked toward the door. By the door handle he stopped, looking like he was waiting for something, but when it didn't happen he continued out of the door. _

_I listened carefully until his steps were gone outside the door, and then my legs collapsed under me as on cue. I grabbed harshly around my hair with both hands and clenched my eyes shut in pain. I wanted to scream all the air out of my lungs, but I couldn't._

_The tears streamed down my cheeks and I bent forward in agony. I had heard people say that sorrow could hurt, but I had just thought they were weaklings. Now I felt it myself. My chest tightened, my stomach sent pangs through me at every sob. I was weak and defenseless. _

_I wanted Kaoru to hold me, but I had sent him away. Why had I nullified the promise? I needed him. Fuck… _

I shook myself out of the memory and back to my room, just in time to see my door open, and a pair of ocean-blue orbs look in.

"Do you want to watch a movie?" Tamaki questioned, peeking his blonde head into my room. I hadn't left my room for two days, haven't gone to school. I barely ate, because my appetite was totally gone. The blonde visited me every day to make me active again, and bring me food – that I didn't eat.

"No thank you," I murmured, sitting on my bed with my back to him.

"Want to take a walk? or... talk about it?"

"No, and _Absolutely_ No."

"What happened between the two of you?" he questioned slightly annoyed. "You have been totally stuffy the last 48 hours. Did Kaoru go back home?"

"I don't know where that kid is, and that's not why I'm sad, I don't care about that jerk," I lied to him and gave him a scowl, but as always, Tamaki didn't get the picture. Instead he walked in with his slender arms crossed, looking at me with absolutely no patience.

"Then tell me what happened.

"It's none of your business!" I snapped at him.

"Tell me!"

"Get out!"

"Not before you tell me!"

"I don't want to!"

"I'm your friend! What. Happened?"

I clenched my fists and jumped to my feet in anger.

"Fine! _Everything_ happened you persistent jerk!" I spat, stamping my foot in the ground and glared at him like a mad man. "My world turned upside down, the minuet we saw that stupid kid, Kaoru, who claimed to be my twin! I'm glad he's gone! But he has left a lot of crap behind, you know! Haruhi rejected me the other day, because of him! He said something to her, I just know it!"

"Haruhi… rejected you?" Tamaki whispered, his face wiped from emotions.

"Yes," I said, and turned back around.

"Is that why you have turned into a room-zombie?"

"Leave me alone!"

Tamaki opened his mouth angrily about to say a piece of his mind, but suddenly it closed and he looked down. "Fine, I will!" He shouted after a while, looking flustered and shocked. "I'll let you rot in your own pathetic tears then, when you wont even accept help from those around you." And with those words he turned around, about to leave, but stopped halfway through the room.

I leveled my eyes with his face confused. "What? Do _you_ have something you have kept a secret for _me_? Or have you just been paralyzed?"

Tamaki was silent for a long moment, and then he slowly turned his head toward me. "Well, I'm sorry."

"For what?" I asked and side-glanced toward him.

"Well, for everything, I guess," he murmured, mimicking the words I had just said, and leaned against the wall behind him. I stared at his expression. His features had fallen into sadness and guilt, pinned to the floor. Completely different from just a second ago.

"What is it?" I asked again, furrowing my eyebrows.

"You'll be … mad," Tamaki began, but slowly approached me. "You see, Kaoru might not- I mean, um, I might have… sort of… been the reason this all began."

"What? What are you talking about, tell me properly," I groaned and crossed my arms.

"Promise you won't hate me," he whispered, finally looking in my eyes.

"Whatever, just tell me," I almost bounced on the bed now.

"Hikaru- I- _I'm_ in love with Haruhi."

I heard the words, but it took be a long time to comprehend them. "Excuse me?"

"It's since a little while ago. I thought… that I could make her talk to _you_ and ended up talking to _her_ and things … happened," Tamaki babbled, looking heartbroken. "I'm so, so _so_ sorry, Hikaru. I never meant to fall in love with her, but she's just so- you know, and it happened. I'm sorry."

I had had enough. This was too much for me to handle. Too twisted.

I stood up with a quick movement, glaring at the blonde with a hateful scowl and then… I punched Tamaki Suoh with all my strength.

* * *

><p>(Kaoru POV)<p>

He hadn't been looking for me at all. I played with my fingers bored and sighed. My phone lay on the table, ready to take his call, with the battery all full. But he hadn't called, or searched for me, even though I was at the most obvious place. The hotel.

I felt worse every day, both mentally and physically. I hadn't been to a doctor for a while; I actually hadn't been out of my room for more than a few minuets. Some stupid part of me seemed to hope that Hikaru would come if I waited long enough. But I was starting to doubt it.

And just as those depression thoughts ran through my head, My phone rang.

I almost didn't believe my ears. _Was Hikaru calling me? _I tried to suppress my excitement until I saw the screen.

_Incoming call: Tamaki mobile_

I stomped my foot into the ground and screamed mentally, while punching at the air. But then I got myself together and answered the phone.

"Yes," I murmured, not able to hold back my disappointment.

"_Kaoru! Thank god you picked up. Are you still close by? I really need your help_-" Tamaki spat, and I stretched the phone away from my ear in shock.

"Tamaki, calm down!" I demanded into the phone and hesitantly put it back to my ear. "What's wrong?"

"_W-well_-" he began, and my eyes slowly widened while he spoke.

"Got it," I mumbled before he was done.

"_Wait Ka_-" But I had already hung up and grabbed my coat.

* * *

><p>(Hikaru POV)<p>

It rained, but I didn't mind, it fit perfectly to my mood.

Haruhi and Tamaki had been hooking up behind my back, which had been the main reason she had rejected me without second thought. Kaoru had dropped two huge bombs on me, (1) that he was in love with me and (2) that he was going to die. I'M HUMAN! How am I supposed to react to all that AT ONCE!

I hugged my body to keep warm, but still continued walking. There were almost no people out in the bad weather, only a few ones running to safety.

Luckily the bus stop wasn't far away. Some people would come up with excuses for doing what I was about to, but I can say it straight forward: I was running away.

It wasn't before I went down the dark road that I realized that this was the place where Kaoru and I had first met – or… I had met him for the first time, he didn't met me before later, I guess. It was where he had been arrested, because the police had thought he was I.

My lips pulled into a weak smile by the thought. He had been all flustered, when they had grabbed him. It was the first time I had ever been worried about someone, mostly because of curiosity though.

Suddenly a pair of headlights shone behind me, illuminating the ground before me and I turned. I was the bus. Driving through the cascades of rain like a ship through fog. It almost looked like it was floating, until it came closer. I stared at the vehicle with emotionless eyes. Emotionless, but with so many hidden emotions.

It stopped by the edge of the road, and opened its door. I lifted my head, and looked into the bored eyes of the driver. He was an elderly man with a crooked nose and a bad cough. I stepped close to the bus, my hair dripping water down my face, and my clothes so soaked that it clung itself to me, as an extra layer of skin.

"Are you getting on, or what?" the bus-driver asked me and waved his hand in a hurry. My eyes blinked twice in realization that I was staring like an idiot at the bus, while standing paralyzed on the small step.

"Y-yeah, sorry," I mumbled and hurried to dig into my pocket to buy a ticket.

"No problem," the driver murmured wearily, and yawned. "I'm just in a hurry to finish my route so I can get home to my family."

"Oh," I just whispered and walked by him to the seats. I plumped down in a seat, realizing how wet I really was, when my seat was instantly soaked. I was happy that the bus was almost empty, except a sleeping teenager in the back who was blasting his ears of with his headphones - how he slept was a mystery.

I heard the doors close and the bus made an exhausted sigh before it started pulling away from the road. I bit my lip and covered my face with a palm.

What had I been thinking? I had no money, no contacts, and no phone, hell, I didn't even have a toothbrush. I had just brought money for the bus and my own two feet.

I sighed, but suddenly I flung forward in my seat. The bus had instantly stopped, and so sudden too. I widened my eyes and was about to yell my question toward the bus-driver, when the doors suddenly opened.

"Good gracious," I heard a breathless voice exclaim and a slender boy supported himself to the side of the bus in exhaust. "Thank god you stopped."

"Haven't I let you in once?"

I stood up stunned. A teen, as soaked as I, grinned at the bus-driver. He was out of breath and his cheeks were red from running.

"If you say that, that means I chased the right bus," Kaoru laughed and turned his head down toward the seats in the bus. His eyes flickering around shortly before finding mine, and then his smile brightened even more. "Found you."

* * *

><p><strong>AN: Okay, I know I said that this would be final... but ooh well, I got a few new ideas. ^_^ Hope you don't mine. **

**AND OMFG! Someone stole my story and posted it on another site. O_O I was informed by a friend and was totally mad. The person had taken the story and just changed the characters names and heading, but used my exact chapter titles + quotes and wording. It's taken down now though.**

**That's why I'm making that copy-thingy! **

**REVIEWING-WONDERS:**

**Bunny345** (LOL, you know there's 6 chapters + a prologue written, right? :D But thank you for reviewing - even on chappy one. ^^)

**wishIwereanime (**OMG, Now I'm so offended, I can't believe you wrote that! Hehe, noooo I'm kidding, I promise to take it all as compliments. :D Glad you liked the chappy. ^_^/)

**OuranFire (**It sure was! Now you know that Kaoru will die, that's always good to know. xD You're right with the rebel-reaction on being gay. Hikaru is probably a homophope who is gay. O_O'' LOL! DW he'll soften up. ^^)

**Hikaru-and-Kaoru-Love (**Don't get a heart-attack! xD Kao will hear your love from behind the screen and through the word-ducument. :D But anyway, thanks for reading. ^^)

**I'll Nom Your Soul (**Yeeeeeees! xD And thank you for liking Hika's reaction... I tried to keep him in character, but you don't know how badly I wanted to make him saw something like: "aww, cute kao-chan of course I accept you! I love you as well, and I'm now going to completly change! Let's go to my place and have a drink with a *cough* _**lemon**_ *cough*.")

**GoPlayInTrafficxox (**Hmm, leukemia? That would have been a good one, but I have something else in mind - besides, it's always Leukemia in stories. xD But thank you for reviewing.)

**xdeathxbunnyx (**This time, I'll mention you! :D And you probably didn't read it yet because of thise DAMN ERRORS that keeps spinning around my story. xD And Yeah, Kaoru didn't time that confession very well, Hikaru turned mad-man by sudden all the information. xD)

**brings074065 (**Yep, that's Kaoru's "far away"-place. xD That sounds so sad when you say it like that. T^T But, I lol'ed at your advice for Hikaru! Just freaking LOVE HIM! Haha! :D)

**KyubiKanji (**Thank yoou! And things will kind of sort out! I have an ending in mind already. *mysterious grin*)

** (**Yup plot-twist. hehe. ^^ There have been a few of those. And I think we're all a big pack of HikaKao fangirl (or guys, I don't judge. :D))

**AnimeRomantic4Ever (**LOL! That sounded more like a threat to Hikaru than a fact "If Kaoru's dying you're going with him" - Hikaru looks shocked, "B-but I don't want to d-" TOO BAD! AnimeRomantic4Evar have spoken! :D)


	8. Chapter 7

**ATTENTION!**

**This fanfiction may not be copied ****and/or used on other sites. **©

* * *

><p><strong><span>Chapter 7<span>**

There's no other love like the love for a brother.

There's no other love like the love from a brother.

~Terri Guillemets

_(Hikaru POV)_

Kaoru stood still and looked at me in the dark bus. His smile had fallen to a frown by my serious and hurt expression when I saw him. My eyes flickered out the window and back to him for a moment. Then I held his gaze.

The rain streamed down the windows, and the soft tapping of rain and the bus engines soft roar was the only sound around us. The teen with the headphones was still sleeping soundly in the far end of the bus and the bus driver was still coughing regularly up front.

"Hello," Kaoru said weakly, trying to smile softly, but stopped instantly when I shook my head.

"No. No "hello's". Get off," I said, trying to sound calm, but my hurt expression was horribly obvious – even I knew that.

"Hikaru-"

I lifted a finger to stop him. "When you said you were my brother, I was okay with that," I uttered at him, holding his eyes. Kaoru furrowed his eyebrows, but didn't cut me off, so I continued. "Again when you started living with me, and going to my school, I was actually never truly mad. I have always been alone, and people have judged me for that, so I was used to it. But…" My voice suddenly shook and I cursed myself mentally, but held his gaze as my eyes turned blanker. "But then you came and started making everything so… complicated, I… was not … I was _not_ okay anymore."

I had to hold a pause to forced a sob back and while I did Kaoru quietly sat down next to me, just watching me with a sad expression.

"Why?" I began again, but my voice was only shaking more and the tears were nearly escaping my eyes now. "Why did you have to make everything so complicated?"

Kaoru's eyes saddened even more, but he didn't say anything. I held his eyes deeply.

"You're the first person I have had in my life, except Tamaki, who just betrayed me," I ran a frustrated hand through my hair. "You're the first one I asked to help me and stay by my side. The first one that I have opened up to. Why did you have to complicate that?"

I suddenly realized that a tear had slipped down Kaoru's cheek, but I just sniffled and looked at my hands instead. "Why couldn't you just let all that stay how it was?"

Kaoru's eyes kept staying on my face, but I couldn't look into his.

"I'm sorry," he whispered weakly after a while. I sniffled again and blinked while looking at the ceiling, to force my tears inside. Then I sighed.

"It doesn't even matter anymore." I let my head fall into my palm and closed my eyes in concentration. I wouldn't weep like a depressed wuss, I was better than that.

"At least look in my eyes when you say that," Kaoru begged me. His was voice quiet. I scoffed at his words and chuckled humorlessly. Kaoru licked his lips and spoke again. "Hikaru, what do you want me to do? Do you want me to "stay by your side" as I promised? Do you…" Kaoru flung his hand out frustrated. "Do you want me to quit, what do you want from me?"

"I don't know," I whispered and shrugged.

There was a moment of silence, where I only listened to Kaoru's breathings. Somehow they matched mine perfectly, so I held my breath in a short second to uneven them, but somehow they ended up matching again. Urg...

"Hikaru," he suddenly said and I took my attention away from our breathings. "I don't feel very good."

"You think I do? I want to be alone, but you keep showing up and make things-"

"No. I mean, I really... don't feel good."

I looked back at him and sighed with tired eyes. "Kaoru, if you're not feeling well, you should just go home! I want a moment alone. I want to gather my thought…"

"Hikaru," Kaoru murmured, but I barely noticed his voice.

"…I'm so done with all this drama, and stupid hypocrites around me, like you and Tamaki and even Haruhi. I need to get away…"

"Hikaru."

"… start over, and forget about all this crap in school and all these people who only look at me in a bad light-"

"Hikaru! STOP TALKING!" Kaoru yelled, looking furious. "Have you ever thought…" Kaoru shouted, but hurried to calm himself with a quick breath and continued in a more calm tone, "Have you ever thought about anyone but your own wellbeing?"

"Wha-" I began, but Kaoru cut me off.

"You judge _everyone_ around you," he accused with a shaking voice and pointed at me with blank eyes. "But you never turn around and look at your own face in the mirror! Because you're too fucking scared of what you're going to see."

I furrowed my eyebrows in surprise, and shook my head. "I can't give you what you-"  
>"I don't need you to be my lover," Kaoru cried out and reached out toward me, but pulled his hand back halfway. "I just don't want to quit. I just want to be with you as long as I possibly can. While… there's still time. I want a brother, who cares for me. Who would care that I was fucking DYING!"<p>

I swallowed startled, and the teen in the back of the bus stirred in his sleep, and Kaoru sighed deeply before he continued.

"I don't know what to do for you, Hikaru. I don't know what the right thing to do is," Kaoru suddenly came closer to look at me better, his eyes pleading and sad. "I once promised you to stay by your side. Can you give me that same promise, now, when I need you? Just the short while I have left."

I pressed my lips together. "I…" I ruffled my hair in thought. "You-" Kaoru stared at me, but I just couldn't continue my sentence. It was like the words were stuck halfway out of my mouth. No one had ever talked to me like that before, most people just whispered behind my back. This had seriously taken me off guard.

"Fine, I understand," Kaoru suddenly uttered, and stood up. "I get it," I looked up shocked, realizing that the bus had stopped and Kaoru was rushed toward the door.

I opened my mouth to shout after him, but it was like my throat was dry. By the bus' door he did the same thing as at the bathroom the other day; stopped by the exit and waited, just a few seconds, before he lowered his head and went into the pouring rain. I couldn't see his face, so I didn't know what expression he was wearing, but he was probably furious with me.

I stared out of my window, watching his bent and weak figure walk through the cascades of rain. His fingers dug into his shoulders in his attempt to keep warm. He wasn't even wearing a coat.

I heard the bus doors close and pressed my lips together. The engine started and I still stared at my brother. Suddenly his legs stopped walking, and I held my breath for a second.

The bus started to drive when I realized his legs collapsed and he fell to his knees.

(_Kaoru POV)_

I walked into the pouring rain with tears streaming down my cheeks. Hikaru hadn't understood me at all, and now he was going to leave, and I was too fucking weak to stop him.

The bus' doors closed behind me and I grabbed around my trembling shoulders to keep warm when I stepped out in the furious storm. The wind ripped in my limbs, the icy rain soaked my clothes and the cold crept into my bones like needles. It was so cold.

I coughed in my fist and accidentally took a wrong step. I stumbled a little on my legs before I looked at my hand. I had coughed blood again. My lips pressed together in tension and I fumbled for my phone.

I heard the bus pull away from the street.

That's when my legs disappeared underneath me. It was so sudden that I gasped out in shock as I landed on all four on the wet rocks. My palms scraped against the dirt and stones on the ground.

I felt the raindrops run down my neck as I lay there, uttering rasping breaths and trying to get a hold of myself on my hands and knees.

My body ached and screamed in pain. I gasped for air and lost balance, now lying flat on the ground. I coughed again, more blood. The mixture of blood, spit and rainwater dripped from my chin and I started crying.

This was all so hopeless. I almost couldn't bear it. Was I really going to die now? After confronting Hikaru and getting rejected… twice. It was too much.

My vision blurred. I was giving up. My breathings quickened. My mouth opened. Hikaru had left me. My body went limb. I was going to die alone by a dark bus stop.

"Kaoru!" a voice sounded through the drumming of rain against the asphalt. "Fucking Idiot!" I heard a voice cry out and I heard running steps against the ground. I turned my head slightly toward the sound, and saw the silhouette of a person come storming toward me. His clothes slammed against his body as he ran, his hair was messy and windblown. His eyes were wild with fury and anger.

No, that couldn't be Hikaru. Hikaru wouldn't stop the bus to come back to me, he had just proven that. I was probably imagining things.

But yet, it looked so much like him as he came sprinting closer.

"You moron! You stinking wuss of a douchebag!" he screamed as he ungracefully tripped down by my side. I stared at him blankly, not even able to believe in hope anymore. My face had fallen in a constant emotionless mask, and I had to use all my concentration to focus on his face.

"Kaoru, look at me!" he demanded and grabbed my face between both hands. So warm. "Look at me! Look at me! Kaoru, you idiot, you- don't give up, don't you dare give up. Oh god." His voice cracked and water streamed down his face. I didn't know if it were tears, or just rainwater.

With shaking hands he started to search my pockets and ended up letting out a frustrated moan.

"Don't you have your phone? Kaoru, Where's your phone, you fool! Reckless, stupid-" he cried out, looking frustrated and tilted my head slightly. "You can't just tell me all those things that you did and then-" he stopped talking and sobbed loudly.

His hands trembled as he pulled me up from the ground and hugged my body closely to his. His fingers dug into my back and he buried his head in my hair.

"Fuck!" he whispered and started sniffled. "Where's your jacket, moron? Oh god, Kaoru, don't die like this. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. I know I don't deserve it, but please, please forgive me, I'm so sorry," He pulled me away, and I wished I could show some kind of emotion, but I could barely look at him. It took all my concentration to listen to his voice.

"You're going to be fine," he promised with a trembling voice, caressing a wet hair from my face. "I'm getting you to the hospital, right now. Okay? Kaoru, don't close your eyes, please. Please…"

But I couldn't stop it. My eyelids felt like they had the whole world on them.

Oh, how I wished that was Hikaru. It felt so much like him, it sounded so much like his voice. How I wished it was him.

"Kaoru, d-do you remember when you promised to stay with me? I was really happy, Kaoru," he stuttered and held my face between his palms. My eyes was almost closed, but I did my best to focus on him. "I was a moron for letting you go, but ... but I'll be better now. I'll be a better brother, so please-" his voice trailed off.

He made a soft sob before he continued. "So please don't leave me."

_Please._

And suddenly I couldn't hear his voice anymore as I drifted into darkness.

* * *

><p>CLIFFY alert! :D poor Kao.<p>

AWESOME PPL! :

Hikaru-and-Kaoru-Love - Haha, I'm happy you're liking the story. :D

Midnight Custard - I knoow! I think it's rotten too, and especially because I just found out he tried to get it PUBLISHED! By changing the name of the characters O_O I don't know if that's a compliment though, but he made Kaoru into a girl named Rebecca AND THAT is insulting in itself. xD And yeah, Hikaru gives me a headache too, so I thought it was time for him to soften up. :D

wishIwereanime - hahahaha, fanfic Ninja? Thank you very much, I love that. :D

Princess Chi of Ouran - Well Hallo my dear fangirl. :D You are in luck, because there's a whole bunch of fangirls here. ^_^ Hehe.

GoPlayInTrafficxox - LOOOL! I like that you just made out a whole storyline off the top of your head. hehe. :D But no, they aren't running away together. But it was a great idea though. xD

OuranFire- haha, "Hikaru the gay Homophobe", that will be his nickname in this story, LMAO - but he's gotten a little less homophobic though, don't you think? :D and Tamaki is "bad ass", lol, I guess he kinda is. :b

Bunny345 - LMAO (right back at ya) thank you. :D

brings074065- Awww, thank you for saying that, and yeah it's totally annoying when someone copy your story. GRR! But I wrote to the person and made him take it down. :D He tried to get it freaking PUBLISHED, by changing the names of the characters... and you wanna know the worst part? He made Kao a girl... named Rebecca. D:

AnimeRomantic4Ever - oh, so Hikaru would be killing half of himself by running away... so Kao would go into the rain... but he did that because Tamaki stole Haruhi... which he did because he talked to her... which he did because Hikaru was too much off a wuss to do so... which he was because he was nervous... which he was becau- Okay, I'm gonna stop there. It's EVERYONES FAULT! :D

someonewhoisherebutnothere- Alright, I will. ^_o


	9. Chapter 8

**ATTENTION!**

**This fanfiction may not be copied ****and/or used on other sites. **©

* * *

><p><strong><span>Chapter 8<span>**

**I have had dreams and I have had nightmares,**

**but I have conquered my nightmares because of my dreams.**

**- Jonas Salk**

_(Hikaru POV)_

I lay by his bed in the hospital. My head was pressed into my palms, but I hadn't cried. It hurt in my chest, but I would not cry in public. That was against my principles.

_Bib bib bib_

That noise was the constant sound of the machine that held my brother alive. Or… kept him as a vegetable at least. He was just lying there, and if the machine hadn't made his chest move up and down, I would have thought he was dead.

_Bib bib bib_

I didn't know how long I had stared at him. How many nights I had refused to leave his side, and the nurses had eventually given up and just brought me a bed next to my brother.

_Bib bib bib_

One day a doctor came into the room. Folding his arms in his lap in a chair across from where I held my brothers hand tightly. I should have known by the look in his eyes, but his words took me by surprise regardless.

He was middle-aged, with a few gray hairs starting to show in his black haircut. He was thin and looked like someone who knew his business.

"You know that machine is the only thing keeping your brother alive, right?" the doctor said and smiled at me with great pity, and that was with good reason; I probably looked like a mess. I hadn't showered in days, I hadn't gone outside, and I had barely eaten anything or slept.

"I know," I responded shortly, squeezing my brother's hand.

"Your brother have a serious damage to the left side of his brain," the doctor continued, talking slowly so I would understand fully. "It is theoretically impossible for him to live a normal life from this point forward. Even if he will wake up, which is very unlikely, he will never be able to make a rational decision again. He probably won't even have the ability to move around or see."

"What are you trying to say," I mumbled, looking horrified. I didn't want the next words to come, I didn't want them.

"Hikaru, it's time to let your brother go," the man explained, and my lips pressed into a thin line. I shook my head furiously.

"No! I can't, I promised-"

"We have done the research and you are the only relative Kaoru have left," the doctor told me, taking me by surprise.

"I-I am? But, I thought…"

"Therefore we can't make this decision without your consent," the doctor told me and leaned forward in his chair, eying me. "You have to give us permission, Hikaru. You have to let us pull the pluck."

I felt my eyes heat and I ran both hands across my face. "I can't…" I whispered. How could they ask me to make this decision? He was still alive. I COULD SEE HIM MOVE! How could they ask me to let him go like this? I wouldn't.

_Bib bib bib_

"I will give you time to think about it," he said and stood up. I held my breath until he had closed the door and then I sprinted toward it and locked it. I grabbed a chair and scraped it across the floor, barricading the door.

_Bib bib bib_

Then I pulled another chair by the door and then a bed. And then everything I could find in the room, until Kaoru's bed and the machine was the only thing left.

_Bib bib bib_

Then I let out a scream in pain and bolted toward my brother. I cried my eyes out for hours by his side, not even noticing the slams from behind my barricade. This was too much, I couldn't handle it. I looked down at his pale cheeks and stroke a hair from his face, before sobbing pathetically.

"I wished… I wished this had never happened?" I told him weakly. "I wished it had never turned out like this. That you had never tried to find me. You could have lived if it wasn't for me."

I looked at the drop leading into his arm by a needle. Then I smiled down at him.

"But don't worry…" I whispered and pulled the needle from his arm. "I will join you very soon."

And then I pressed the edge of the needle down my wrist and pressed the entire drop into my arm.

... ... ...

... ... ...

... ... ... blank...

... ... ...

_bib bib bib_

(_Kaoru POV_)

_Bib bib bib_

I clenched my eyes tighter when I felt the strong light shine through my eyelids as bright dots.

_Bib bib bib_

I knew that sound. It was the sound of one of those machines at the hospital. But why was I hearing this? Wasn't I dead? Hadn't I died at the bus stop?

_Bib bib bib_

I forced my eyelids open, but closed them again when the light streamed into my sensitive orbs. I groaned and just as the sound escaped my mouth a hand grabbed mine.

"Kaoru?" a drowsy voice whispered and I forced my eyes open. A messy haired boy, with tired eyes and deep dark circles under his auburn orbs looked up at me. When his mind seemed to clear he jumped from his chair next to my bed.

"Kaoru!" he said again, now fully awake. "Thank god you're okay, little brother." He jumped up and hugged me tightly into his body. When he pulled away a wide smile was spread across his face.

He somehow seemed... different.

I tilted my head on the pillow and smiled weakly, shaking away the thought. "What happened?" my voice was raspy and dry, and I had to cough a little to clear my throat.

"You fainted," Hikaru told me and put a hand on my cheek. "I was so worried, you have been out for about three days. The whole club has been so worried."

"I'm much bet- wait what did you say?" I asked, widening my eyes. "What club?"

"The host club of course," Hikaru laughed merrily and patted me on the head. "Haruhi, Tamaki, Kyouya, Honey and Mori. And all the girls are awaiting our act too."

"What are you…" I began, but suddenly I remembered.

That's _right_. I was Kaoru Hitachiin, the little devil in the host club, along with my brother Hikaru Hitachiin. We were actors and "lovers" at Ouran High School.

"Well, the doctors says that it's nothing serious," Hikaru smiled and patted my head. "Which means that you will be alright by the time we're going to the commoners zoo. Aren't you excited? Tamaki haven't talked about anything else for the whole days you have been out."

I rubbed my eyes, my head was spinning strangely. "I had the strangest dream." I uttered drowsily.

"That's funny, me too," Hikaru laughed awkwardly and grinned. "It was so realistic. While I saw sleeping by your side, it was like I was pulled into another universe. I didn't have you, and was in love with Haruhi."

"And you lived with Tamaki…"

"… and you showed up as my long lost twin…"

"… and I had a disease…"

"… and Tamaki cheated on me with Haruhi, or… was it the other way around?"

"… and you ran away, but I chased after you…"

"… and you got sick…"

"…and I died…"

"… and then I made suicide by your side…"

"Freaky!"

"Definitely!"

"Let's get some ice cream."

* * *

><p><strong>THE END! <strong>

**I bet none of you saw that ending coming. :D Thank you for all your reviweing and support thoughout this story. This have probably been the story that I have had most relation to in real life, and you have all been there for me. So thank you - again - this is getting emotional, I'm sorry, I'll end on a happy note. :D**

**I promised my friend to end it like this. It was planned since Kaoru chased after Hikaru on the bus. LOL! Hope you aren't too mad at me. AND OMFG! I never added a lemon! And I call it a "m" story *sighs disappointedly*, well, I'll just have to make a much better one in the next story. ;b **

**- ValeurStories. (hearts and love to you all) **


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